Habits, Good and Bad

In the past couple of days, I've read a couple of interesting articles that got me thinking about habits.

The first is from Zen Habits.  In the article, the author shares his disdain for resolutions and proposes that, instead, we should be forming habits to establish long-term change.  I thought it was interesting because most of my resolutions involve forming new habits.  I don't really have a fixed objective, like to lose 20 pounds or to save $5,000 or what have you (though those are very good objectives).  Most of my resolutions involve completing a task on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis.  The wording of my resolutions wasn't really a conscious decision on my part, but I'm glad I'm focusing on habits instead of set objectives. 

This isn't to say that I agree with the author - I don't think that setting fixed objectives is necessarily a bad thing to do.  I think that different types of resolutions work better for different personality types.  Most people need a goal - a prize to reach for.  This might be true for people who are very competitive.  I think I have the kind of personality where I need to focus on the process more than the endpoint, so that I don't drive myself crazy or get discouraged.

The second article is from Real Simple.   This article is about breaking bad habits, like poor posture and gossiping.  As I read the article, I realized that none of my resolutions involved breaking bad habits - just forming good ones.  Of course, this is because I don't have any bad habits to break [Insert SarcMark here]

In a way, my resolution to use a planner was a way to break my bad habit of forgetting birthdays (as I wrote this sentence, my mom texted me to remind me that my grandma's birthday is this week - how fitting).

I think that it was important to me to use positive language in making my resolutions, for the simple fact that it is easier to measure the presence of something than the absence of something.  In one of my college psychology classes, we learned that when making requests or giving commands, it's important to use language to convey what we would like the person to do rather than what we don't want the person to do.  For example, if you're in a grocery store and your toddler is sitting in the the cart and keeps reaching out to knock things off of shelves, it would be more effective to say, "Keep your hands in your lap" instead of "Stop knocking things off shelves!"  The branch of positive psychology tries to focus on people's good qualities - and trying to get people to increase behaviors that makes their life better - rather than trying to fix neuroses or deficits.  I tried to apply the same principles to making resolutions.

I'm pretty sure that this strategy, combined with my positive reinforcement behavior chart, means that I am my own lab rat.  There's got to be a good country song in there somewhere.

My 2012 Resolutions

Happy New Year’s!

I’ve never made a New Year’s resolution before.  I guess I never really wanted a change badly enough to make a resolution.  Or maybe it seemed silly to turn what is otherwise known as a “goal” into a “New Year’s resolution”, which makes it sound a lot more daunting and difficult to achieve.

But for whatever reason, I am making not one, not two, but four resolutions this year, each broken down into sub-resolutions (because according to my friend/co-worker, who spent eight weeks leading a goal-setting group at a middle school, goals are supposed to have very specific wording if you ever want to achieve them).

Resolution #1: Take better care of myself.
Sub-resolutions:
    a. Floss every day
    b. Exercise at least twice a week for 30 minutes
    c. Get eight hours of sleep every night

Resolution #2: Stay in touch with my family.
Sub-resolutions:
    a. Call - and have a conversation with - my mom and dad at least twice a week (each)
    b. Twice a week, have a phone or text conversation with my sister
    c. Write and mail a letter to my grandma and aunt twice a month.
   
Resolution #3: Stay organized.
Sub-resolutions:
    a. Once a month, complete a project that will make our home a more pleasant place to live
    b. Use a planner every day - no more forgetting birthdays!
    d. Sweep, mop, dust, and vacuum once a week

Resolution #4: Save money.
Sub-resolutions:
    a. Pack a lunch every weekday
    b. Make a vegetarian meal twice a week (save money on meat)
    c. Try more DIY projects (bake my own bread, make my own household cleaners, etc.)

Why am I sharing this?  According to this CNN article, publically declaring our resolutions can help us stick to them.  Also, I'm hoping that by writing about my resolutions throughout the year, I can be more mindful of them and can develop a better awareness of what strategies are or are not working.

I'm thinking about making some system of positive reinforcement - for example, giving myself a gold star on a chart every time I floss, and rewarding myself once I get to 50 stars, or something like that.  We'll see.